Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize