Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
