I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize