Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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