I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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