I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
