Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize