He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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