Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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