We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Randomize