Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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