Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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