yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
tequila makes me forget i have legs
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
