My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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