Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize