I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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