i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
