best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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