I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
