do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize