new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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