They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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