we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
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I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
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I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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