shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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