Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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