Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
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