Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
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