i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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