She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
