At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Randomize
