I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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