Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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