We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
She's just so happy...and so naked.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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