i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
