just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
