Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
