I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
