She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize