Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
