so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
