was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
