how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize