you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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