nut hugger
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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