i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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