Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
