I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
