i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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