Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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