Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
You were trust falling into bushes
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
